Irreducible Needs: What Kids Must Have to Thrive
Raffi Cavoukian, a children’s singer, songwriter, and child advocate, wrote a song titled – All I really need – which beautifully captures from a child’s perspective their most essential…
Portfolio Categories: Parenting
How to Cultivate Gratitude in Kids
Words matter, and so do the feelings that fuel them. We can teach a child to say ‘thank you’ and cue them when they need…
How The Mother In Us Is Born
I used to think the mother in me was born when I had my first child. My first thought waking up after her birth was,…
Resilience: Embracing the Emotional Journey
Stress seems to lie around every corner. It is there when change happens to us or when we are up against the things we cannot…
Mama or Dada? What Do Children Say First and Why
When babies start to coo and gurgle, parents listen attentively, waiting for the magical sounds they want to hear – their name. But who comes…
Can a Child Be Too Attached to Their Parent?
One of the most common questions I am asked about relationships is whether a child can be too attached? There is a general fear and…
Dealing with Bullying: What Doesn’t Work and What Will
Bullying ranks high on the list of parenting concerns and for good reason. According to the National Institute of Mental Health in the United States,…
What Do Your New Year’s Intentions Reveal About You?
Love them or hate them, forming new year’s intentions are part of many people’s ritual in leaving one year behind and making way for a…
Why Being Grateful Isn’t Something You Teach
We can command a child to say ‘thank you’ but this won’t ensure that they feel grateful or appreciative towards someone. The place gratitude arises…
Time Travelling – The Hardest Part of Parenting
Tantrums? Resistance? Discipline? Exhaustion? These are some of the things parents say are the hardest to deal with when it comes to raising kids. I…
There is time with them that we try to capture with photos and videos despite the futility of being able to hold them fast. From the goofy faces to red eyes, capturing them in time and space seems foolhardy.
There is also the time that is needed to make dinner, get them to school, clean up, and do homework. There also seems to be so little time for you, and the time that is most welcome is when you fall into your bed (or theirs), tired. There are the times in the night we are woken up with our worries about them, or their nightmares and tummy aches for us.
Time doesn’t wait until our child is done with a tantrum, has found their tears, or has decided that maybe the red socks will be fine to wear to school after all. Time speeds up when you are running late and especially as they make time move slower with their shuffling feet. Time waits for no one, including your boss at work or your child’s teacher at school.
The hardest thing to do sometimes is to make time for them. It means taking the time to just be present, play, or perhaps listen to them with undivided attention for a moment. It is these times that etch into their hearts and minds who we are to them and how we have cared for them.
What I have come to realize is that it isn't time that is precious to me, but the people who fill it. The spaces that lie between the seconds and minutes are the ones I endeavour to fill with the people I care about. It is not time that shapes us, creates us, nor defines us but who or what we attach to in these spaces. There is one thing I am sure of when it comes to raising kids and that is we won’t likely regret spending time on them, in fact, it is often the case we regret never spending the time we have in the right places.
Dr. Deborah MacNamara is the author of 
